, Author at Paul Duxbury

The Little Engine That Could – Positive About Affirmations

One of the pieces of advice I always give people who are job searching is to focus on the positives. That’s advice I am taking myself as I undertake a search for a new Learning and Development role.

As I have been reflecting on my experience and skills one of things that I recalled was when I first encountered the concept of Positive Affirmations some years ago. It was the Lou Tice Investment in Excellence programme which I recall at the time I approached with a healthy degree of cynicism. However, whilst some of the claims that I have seen made for Positive Affirmations since then, have brought out that cynicism in me I must admit I do find them helpful in terms of focusing on my own skills and knowledge.

I am sure you have encountered those who try to convince you that by simply telling yourself something you can become it/achieve it. Whilst I don’t subscribe to that approach I do believe that using positive affirmations as part of our self-talk (which I have written about previously) can have a very positive impact on how we approach challenges such as finding a new job.

So I wanted to take a moment or two to re-visit what positive affirmations are all about and to share some thoughts about them.

What Are Affirmations?

Think of affirmations as words and sentences with the power to transform. By saying them out loud or to yourself, they have the power to affect both your conscious and subconscious mind in order to stimulate your emotions, encourage, and inspire. They are a form of positive self-talk, and also guided imagery to a certain extent. You picture your own success, and that all your efforts are working towards that better future.

Finding affirmations that work for you in all areas of your life can help you get “unstuck” and move forward with a renewed sense of energy and empowerment. We do not have to be a helpless victim of circumstance.

Instead of having a coach give you a pep talk before the interview, you will already be psyching yourself up to perform well through your personal affirmations.

Affirmations are just one of many tools for personal and professional success, but they can also be one of the most powerful if you find affirmations that resonate with you, and use them on a regular basis. There are many free affirmations available on the internet that you can use, or you can make up your own based on your own personal circumstances.

Affirmations can help you transform your life for a number of reasons. They can play many different roles, including:

Motivating
Focusing your mind and efforts on the goal
Tapping into the power of your subconscious
Countering negative self-talk with positive self-talk
Pushing out self-doubt and self-criticism with “can do” messages
Enhancing your self-esteem

If you struggle with a lack of confidence, affirmations can put you on a whole new path to success. Remember the Little Engine that Could? His affirmation was, “I think I can, I think I can.”

Four Leadership Assessment Tools

There are a number of leadership assessment tools that can help you decide if you have what it takes to be a leader, or to spot your strengths and weaknesses as a leader. In this way you can make the most of your opportunities and really start to shine. You can find many of these types of tools however the four that follow are certainly worth taking a look at:

1. Myers Briggs Tests

More and more human resources departments require candidates to take the Myers Briggs personality test in an attempt to determine what kind of worker they will be. There are 16 different personality types, with the classifications based on four main factors:

1 – Are you outwardly or inwardly focused?
* Extrovert (E)
* Introvert (I)

2 – How do you take in information
* Sensing (S)
* Intuition (N)

3 – How do you make decisions
* Thinking (T)
* Feeling (F)

4 – How do you live your outer life?
* Judging (J)
* Perceiving (P)

These four factors can be combined into 16 personality types, such as:
ENTJ, the commander
ESTJ, the executive
ESTP, the entrepreneur
INFP, the mediator

Take the free test at MBTI and read your results. Determine how accurate the report is. You may gain some insight into your leadership style and learn more about your strengths and weaknesses as a leader.

2. Kellogg School of Management Tools

The Kellogg School of Management, part of Northwestern University, has a very useful page of tools: the Leadership Assessment Tool Inventory, which offers a range of exercises you can take to learn more about your leadership style. Modules include:

* Gaining Power and Influence
* Using Influence Strategies
* Effective Empowerment and Delegation
* How Creative Are You?

Take all the exercises at Kellogg and use what you learn to improve your leadership skills.

3. The Mind Tools Website

This interesting site offers a range of free tools to test your business and career-related skills. The free test at https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/newLDR_50.htm will give you a score and detailed feedback on what you should do to improve your leadership skills, plus suggestions for further reading and self-help activities.

They also offer a leadership motivation tool on Mind Tools that can help you determine how motivated you are to be a leader, both in terms of wanting the responsibility and helping others.

4. Benchmarks Assessments

The Center for Creative Leadership (CCL) offers a range of what they term benchmark assessments to help determine how effective a leader a person is on CCL

The four modules available are:
* Executives
* Managers
* Learning agility
* Design

You can take the tests yourself. You can also be certified as a test administrator so you could give the test to others interested in improving their skills, such as if you were working as a leadership coach or consultant. Pricing is based on the size of a group, so you and any colleagues who might aspire to leadership might all wish to take it.

There are many leadership assessment tools that can help you work towards a leadership position, or improve your skills to become a better leader. Take the time and effort to invest in yourself to become a better leader, and see what a difference it can make to your life and the lives of everyone you are leading.

Identifying Your Current Leadership Skills and Experience

One of the most important aspects of being a good leader is being able to assess your strengths and weaknesses honestly and do what you can to play to them on the one hand, and minimize them on the other.

The first thing to consider in relation to your current leadership skills and experience is whether you are in any sort of leadership role at the moment. You might not think you’re a leader because you don’t have a fancy title, but you would be surprised at how influential you might actually be in your company without even realizing it – or getting the credit for it.

For example, if you’re the person everyone comes to when they have a problem, you’ve clearly got leadership potential. If your boss or manager is always asking you to head up projects and initiatives, then you’re obviously functioning as a leader.

If you often help other staff through teaching them what you know, then you are also ready for a leadership role. It is just a case of having your role recognized and hopefully getting a title and salary increase to go with it.

If you’ve already served as a leader in the past, or are doing so now, how did it go? Did you have any issues with your own performance? Were there issues with the team? Or were there problems with both?

Being honest about what might have gone wrong and what could have been done better could make all the difference in your level of success if you get another chance to become a leader.

Or maybe you discovered that being a leader wasn’t all you had hoped it was going to be? In this case, assessing what went wrong and your own skills and abilities can help you decide whether you really want to climb the corporate ladder, or stay where you are. There’s nothing wrong with that if you do.

Remember, being a leader isn’t just about getting the best things in the company, but also the responsibility and accountability that goes with the role. The responsibilities could involve significant sacrifices in terms of time, effort, and your personal life. Therefore, it’s important to take a 360-degree look at the impact of a promotion on your family and friends if you were to adopt a leadership role.

What Defines a Leader?

I have been having a number of discussions of late on the topic of leadership which has made me reflect on some of the basics. What is it that defines a Leader today?

Being a good leader is about more than being a manager. It has nothing to do with your seniority level, your title, or being “blessed” with a leadership personality. Leadership is all about focusing on success, with each person in your company or team inspired by your example and willing to follow your lead.

Some people may appear to be born leaders, but the truth is that it can be learned. Attitude is often everything. If you think you can, you will. If you show you care about others, they will care about you and their job, or the task at hand.

These days there are all sorts of leaders, from the heads of corporations to community and church groups to online, with “thought leaders” in various niches and industries, and “trend leaders” who are seen to be worth paying attention to. No one had ever heard of Arianna Huffington until she launched her blog, and even then, it took her some time to become a thought leader to the extent that she was able to sell her company AND be offered a C-level position within it by the new owners.

As you can see, a leader possesses certain qualities which enable them to lead, such as influence and effectiveness. They may lead alone, or be part of a group, with the responsibility for making decisions on behalf of others. Leaders provide guidance and direction. It is not just about command, control and power, but effectiveness and persuasiveness as well.

Whether you think that leaders are born or made, or a bit of both, there are several characteristics that many powerful leaders tend to have in common, and which seem to be lacking in those who are less effective leaders. These characteristics include:

Hard-working
Goal-oriented
Visionary
Creative
Proactive, not reactive
Personable
Motivating
Laser focused
Willing and able to see the whole picture
Resilient
Confident
Self-aware
Good communication skills
Responsible
Reliable
Honest
Able to transform stress into success

I will take a look at each of these below.

Hard-Working

Many top leaders have been described as tireless, always striving to achieve their goals. It is probably no coincidence that many of them do not even own a television. They work towards their own vision instead, using a variety of strategies, tactics and innovations. Many seem to need little sleep as well, and are always alert and full of ideas.

Goal-Oriented

Are you the kind of person who likes to get things done? Do people come to you and ask you to do something for them and know you will follow through? Not everyone is goal-oriented, but those who are may end up being effective leaders.

Visionary

Good leaders do not just look at how things are, but also how they could be. They seek to improve things, usually for the benefit of more people than just themselves. They are constantly creating based on their vision or the potential of what they are trying to create or transform. They will use a variety of strategies and tactics to make their vision a reality.

Creative

Good leaders tend to be very creative or even innovative people who “think outside the box” and are able to come up with a variety of ideas and solutions which no one else has thought of. They lead by example and do not follow others slavishly.

Proactive not Reactive

Good leaders make things happen. They are the “movers and shakers” in their area of expertise. They tend to be known in their industry as the kind of person who is always at least a few steps ahead of everyone else. Again, they do not follow others slavishly; in fact, many people want to imitate them.

Personable

A leader tends to be a people person – someone who derives lots of energy from being around people and working with their team or for them. Such extroverted personalities make great leaders, but introverts are not barred from leadership either. You can have a love for people and still be introverted. In this case, you just respond differently to interacting with others, and would be seen as a good listener rather than a great talker.

Motivating

Good leaders know how to motivate, even when (or especially when) times are tough. They can often get the best out of people who might not even think themselves capable of such great achievements.

Laser Focused

A good leader has a clear vision and purpose and does not allow himself or herself to be distracted or diverted away from that purpose. Think of the difference between a light bulb and a laser. Both use beams of light, but the bulb scatters the beams of light in every direction. A laser uses the beams of light with such focused concentration that they can literally cut through solid substances.

Willing and Able to See the Whole Picture

A leader has laser-like focus to try to accomplish their goals, but the best leaders will take both a focused and a broad view that encompasses a wide variety of factors which can contribute to their success, or hold them back from it.

Resilient

Resilience means bouncing back even when things go wrong. Good leaders aren’t daunted; they learn from what’s happened and press on.

Confident

A belief in himself/herself can sometimes be the only thing that sustains a leader through his/her climb to the top, and the often slippery slope he or she will have to live on once they get there. Even if a leader is not truly confident, they can often “fake it ’til they make it” and convey a sense of command and authority despite being faced with great difficulties.

Self-Aware

Leaders tend to be self-aware with reference to their weaknesses and strengths, but not to the point of letting either one rule them.

Good Communication Skills

True leaders are able to communicate their vision and get people to participate in it. They do their best to “keep people on the same page” within their company or team, while also retaining control of privileged information.

Responsible

Good leaders should not shy away from responsibility. If they take on a task, they should follow it through to its logical conclusion. If they make a mistake, they should admit it and not let someone else take the blame or try to cover it up.

Reliable

Good leaders are reliable and follow through with all of the work assigned to them. They do not make excuses, but deliver what is expected of them on time.

Honest

Leaders in history have possessed this characteristic in varying degrees, but on the whole, they should not be corrupt, greedy or adopt a leadership role simply for their own benefit. If they give their word, they should keep it if it is at all possible.

Able to Transform Stress into Success

Leaders feel stress just like anyone else. It is a question of what they do with that stress. For many people, it is the fight or flight response. Either they will make a stand and work hard to deal with the situation, or they will run from it and try to pretend it doesn’t exist. A good leader will make a stand.

In the next post in this short series I will take a look at four leadership styles, and the pros and cons of each.

The Importance of Emotional Intelligence

As I have observed in my recent posts the concept of emotional intelligence (EI) has become a hot topic of psychological research in recent years, as a way of explaining why some people seem to manage their relationships at home and in the workplace better than others. Instead of Intelligence Quotient (IQ), researchers began to study Emotional Quotient (EQ) – the ability to manage your own emotions and “read” those of others accurately. So why is emotional intelligence so important?

Importance at Home

The advantages of understanding the emotions of others in relation to your home life are obvious. Good EI skills mean better communication, and better communication will usually lead to greater harmony and intimacy in terms of romance. In relation to parents, it will lead to more successful establishment of your independence and overall personality. You won’t need to live according to the labels you’ve been given, such as “mother’s little helper” or “the man of the house.”

Once you become a parent, you will be able to avoid the pitfalls of labeling your children, and allow them to develop and grow according to their talents and interests, not yours. Most parents would love it if their children grew up to be doctors, for example, due to that profession’s perceived status and money-earning potential. However, if you child is not the least bit interested in science and shows no compassion for others, trying to steer their career in that direction would be a disaster for the parties concerned.

Knowing yourself is the best first step to knowing others, so if you’ve been struggling at home, it might be time to assess your EI.

Importance in the Workplace

EI has become of great interest in relation to the workplace. Businesses are made up of people, and the most successful business people have been shown to have high EI – not just intelligence in relation to their career or industry.

As with personal relationships, EI in professional relationships starts with self-awareness. Once we understand our emotions, we can control them and express them in a skillful, not harmful way. We can also understand the thoughts, feelings and points of view of others, and be able to respond to their issues appropriately.

Importance in General

EI is important for a number of reasons:

Mental health and wellbeing – Mastering EI puts us in control of our mind and emotions. It resolves issues from the past and gives us confidence to move toward a better future.
Physical health – Being in control of your emotions puts you in control of your life, cutting down on stress and conflict. This means less wear and tear on your body and better health.
Better communication – If you say what you mean, mean what you say, and become a better communicator who is able to pick up up verbal and non-verbal cues, you will be able to make more connections and reduce conflict.
Better conflict resolution – Even if conflicts do arise despite your increased EI, chances are that they will be easier to resolve because you will be better able to come up with a range of ways to end the issue before it gets out of hand.
More success – Getting along better with others means a smoother path to greater success.
Better negotiating skills – Better EI will improve your negotiating skills, so you will be able to come up with “win-win” deals everyone will be happy with.
Better leadership skills – A leader who is calm, cool, collected, and good at working with others is one other people will be willing to follow. Improve your EI and see what a difference it can make to your life.