Learning and Development Archives - Page 20 of 36

I Want To Be Alone!

Earlier today I was talking with Rachel Burnham about how sometimes we need to find time in our busy schedules just to be alone with ourself which set me thinking about why this is important. I believe that spending time alone is good for you. In fact, there are so many benefits to being alone occasionally that if you’re not doing it now, it’s something that you should schedule into your days.

1. It’s Important to Enjoy Your Own Company – If you’re someone who thinks that person at the corner café reading a book alone is lonely, think again. Being alone can be very meditative, enabling you to just be without having to entertain anyone. When you can learn to be in the moment with yourself, you’ll be a better friend to others too.

2. Alone Time Encourages Creativity – When you’re alone, it’s easier to get into a creative space so that you can think of new ways to do things. It’s only when you can be alone and centered that you can come up with the best ideas, due to the lack of distractions getting in the way of your thoughts and ideas.

3. You’ll Get More Done – There is no doubt that if you also turn off electronics when you’re alone, you’ll get more tasks done than if you’re with others. With no one to distract you to do something else, you’ll be amazed at how much you can get done in one hour alone compared to five hours with a friend.

4. It’s a Great Way to Recharge – Anytime you’re feeling stressed out, try getting even 10 minutes alone to just breathe. Take a brisk walk. If you have to, take a long shower. Do what you can to spend some time alone to revive your mind and body.

5. Helps Improve Depression Symptoms – Studies have shown that spending time alone can help improve problems with depression. Some people think it’s the opposite, but that’s not true. That’s why teenagers often need a lot of time alone in their room. It helps them deal with the stress of the world in a healthy way.

6. Enables You to Clear Your Mind – Do you have too much noise in your brain to focus? Go take a few deep breaths alone. It will only take a few moments. It’s better if you can find an hour or so a day of alone time but if you can’t, even a few moments to breathe can help you clear your mind.

7. You Can Better Let Go of Stress – Some stress that we experience in life is caused by too much activity, too many people, and too much pressure on your time. If you schedule in alone time, you’ll find that you deal with that stress while it’s happening so much better.

8. You Can Do Anything You Want To – The fact is, if you choose an hour a day to spend alone, you can do whatever you want with that time. You can sit there and stare at the wall, or you can meditate, take a walk, exercise or even watch your favorite TV show without interruption. It’s totally up to you how you spend your alone time.

There are enormous benefits to spending time alone. It’s not lonely. There doesn’t need and shouldn’t be activity continuously happening with tons of people around at all times. Human beings aren’t built to always be “on”. Sometimes we need to shut down – and not just at bedtime. If you want to be healthier, happier, and a more well-rounded person, try to schedule in alone time each day.

21 Body Language Habits to Avoid

There are a number of body language habits that are generally considered to send a negative message and it is therefore suggested are best avoided. I am sure that individuals will have very differing views on these but it’s always worth considering whether any of the following are stopping you from keeping communication flowing smoothly.

1. Frowning – This is very unwelcoming.

2. Making a face or scowling – This can be an unconscious expression of disapproval or dislike. Try to maintain a neutral expression even if you don’t like what you hear.

3. A fake smile – This makes you seem unwelcoming and dishonest.

4. Avoiding eye contact – Eye contact shows you are paying attention. Avoiding eye contact could mean you don’t care about what is being said. It might also be a sign you are being dishonest, as in the phrase “he couldn’t look me in the eye”.

5. Staring too long – Excessive eye contact might make you seem aggressive or even rude. In Asian countries, it is considered disrespectful to look directly into the eyes of someone of high status.

6. Squinting – This is similar to frowning. It also indicates dislike.

7. Looking down/stooping – This can suggest disinterest, or arrogance. Staring at your feet and shuffling them can also suggest nervousness and the desire to get away.

8. Crossing your arms in front of your chest – This is very unwelcoming and can also be a sign of a lack of interest or a refusal to communicate.

9. Holding things in front of you – Holding your purse, a folder or coffee cup in front of you or close to your chest is like a barrier, making you seem aloof. If you can’t put them down, hold them to your side if you can.

10. Standing with your hands on your hips – This stance is one of aggression and bossiness, so it can close down communication before it ever really starts.

11. Fidgeting with a pen or your phone – These actions suggest you are really not paying attention to what is being said. It can also indicate impatience for the meeting to be at an end.

12. Checking your watch – This shows you are bored or under pressure and therefore not paying attention fully to what is being said. It also suggests impatience.

13. Leaning away – Leaning away suggests “standoffishness.”

14. Leaning too close – This can invade others’ personal space and make them feel uncomfortable.

15. Casual touches – This can suggest too much familiarity if you don’t know the other person well.

16. Shaking hands – This is accepted in the West but still avoided in Asian countries. A bow, or a prayer sign (wai) with hands pressed together at the level of the chest is more common there.

17. Using your left hand – This can be a problem in the Middle East, where this hand is seen as dirty and only used for lavatory purposes.

18. Leaning against something – This can make you look too relaxed.

19. Sitting with your legs crossed – This can also make you look too relaxed. It is frowned on in Asian countries.

20. Touching your face – Touching the face, especially the nose, is seen as a sign of lying.

21. Touching your hair – Fiddling with your hair seems to indicate boredom or nervousness.

If you have not assessed your own body language recently, it might be time to practice in a mirror, such as when you are speaking on the phone. Or, video yourself and assess your body language. You may have more bad habits than you think. If this is the case, consciously work towards eliminating them and see what a difference it can make to your level of success.

8 Myths about Body Language

Following my recent article about Body Language at Interviews I have had a number of conversations from which it is obvious that there still quite a few myths about Body Language and I thought it was worth taking a look at some of them so that you can avoid these “fake news” ideas. These myths about body language could be preventing you from communicating with others effectively, or picking up the often subtle clues that are important when dealing with people – such as in a tricky business negotiation, or a dispute with a friend or family member.

Here are eight myths to look out for:

1. A smile means the person is happy

It will usually mean that, but it could also mean they are confused, uncomfortable, or just being polite.

2. Liars avoid eye contact

Shy people do too! In fact, studies have shown that pathological liars often look straight at a person in order to make sure their lie is being accepted as truth.

3. Crossed arms always mean resistance or not being approachable

They can actually mean a lot of different things, ranging from “it’s cold” to mirroring because you are actually doing it yourself. It can also stop people from feeling too “exposed”, especially women, until they are able to relax into a situation.

4. Eye direction

The theory is that if a person looks to the right they are lying, and if they are looking to the left, they are telling the truth. There is really no set pattern. The only thing you can do is observe the person to try to gauge what is typical for them.

5. 93% of all our communication is body language

If that were true, we could watch foreign language films and understand them without subtitles. About half of our communication is influenced by body language, but words, tone and style are key. They should ideally match the body language, and vice versa.

6. You can’t practice your body language

This is false. The best public speakers assess themselves in a mirror or on video to see what bad habits they have so they can replace them with good ones. Good salespeople will do this as well to make sure that nothing they do will send an unspoken message that will blow the deal they have put so much effort into.

7. Fidgeting is a sign of nervousness

It might be, but it could also be pent-up energy from having to sit still for too long.

8. Body language is the same the world over

What is acceptable in the West might be completely offensive in the East, and vice versa. Handshakes are still uncommon in Asian countries compared with the bow. Nodding means yes in some countries and no in others. Learning the differences can make you a more successful communicator no matter where you go.

Can Blogging Help You Find A New Job?

As someone who is currently looking for a new role as a Learning and Development Professional and who blogs I have had a number of people ask me whether I think blogging is helpful.

My take is that blogging can help you show off your knowledge, skills and understanding of your area of work. It can also help you to network effectively and if you include a link to it in your CV can even prompt questions at interview as I have found on a number of occasions. Whether you already have a blog or are looking to start one, below are some tips for incorporating your blog into your job search.

Benefits of Using a Blog in Your Job Search

Engage with more people. Blogging is really a social activity. You can use your site to engage new people through techniques such as guest blogging, interviews, and exchanging links. You can also encourage your readers to introduce/recommend you to their network.
Cultivate long term relationships. It’s common for people to spend a year or more looking for a new job these days. A blog makes it easy to stay in touch over a prolonged period.
Help others. Networking is more likely to be enjoyable and productive if you keep it focused on serving others. Your blog is a way to help people find solutions to challenges you’ve both experienced and attract job offers from people who are looking for a candidate like you.
Expand your knowledge. You’ll learn valuable information while you’re researching and writing blog posts. It’s a great way to stay up to date in your chosen field even if you’re between jobs or looking for a position that better matches your long term goals.
Create a portfolio. Think of your blog as a showcase. Potential employers can get to know you through the content you produce. As you establish yourself and gain readers you might even want to consider turning your best posts into eBooks or YouTube videos.
Operate within your budget. If you’re low on funds, it’s okay to start out small. Set up a free blog on something like WordPress.

Effective Strategies

Post regularly. The two top reasons readers give for unsubscribing from a blog is posting too seldom or posting too frequently. Keep your blog fresh but be prudent with more intrusive communications like mass email blasts.
Stick to your topic. Identify your subject area at the start so you consistently deliver what your readers are expecting. You can always start a separate blog for unrelated interests.
Participate in forums, social bookmarking and social media sites. Become a regular on sites like Twitter, LinkedIn or forums on topics related to your blog.Exchange guest posts and comments.
Connect and engage with other popular bloggers in your field. If you write about issues in your area, make reciprocal arrangements to contribute to other local blogs that focus on the same issues.
Get sticky. Encourage your readers to keep coming back. Thank people for their comments and answer their questions. Create a list of your most popular posts so new visitors are encouraged to read more.
Stimulate polite debate. One way to get positive attention is to take a bold stance when you’ve got the facts to back you up. Write a thoughtful post about issues that are being debated in your industry. Maybe then invite an article from a colleague or another blogger who takes the opposing position.

In a competitive job market, it’s important to take advantage of every resource available to you. High quality content and strategic networking will make you and your blog stand out in a crowded field.

Lessons From My Grandfather

In my last post I looked at how we should Paint Ourselves in a Positive Light when it comes to personal presentation. Now I want to take a look at personal presentation when like me, as I write, you are looking for a new role and being called to interview.

It’s strange how lessons learnt at a young age stay with us isn’t it. My Grandfather was a deeply loving man but he was an absolute stickler for dressing “appropriately” and he expected us all to follow suit. I can still recall the look of shock on my Grandfather’s face when I turned up to a family event wearing a brown suit and his question which was along the lines of “Are you going fishing?”

He very much saw brown as a colour for the country and not something that one would wear anywhere else! How times have changed and I am sure that he would be equally shocked at some of the clothes we wear nowadays. However, that comment from him has stuck with me and I cannot recall ever having worn a brown suit. He always told us that one should dress as if we were about to hear that we were being promoted to the Board.

Even today I still find myself wondering when I check how I look in the mirror before going out “would Grandfather approve?” He was very much in my thoughts the other day when I was attending an interview. I knew from my research that the company had adopted “dress down Friday” however, it would not have occurred to me to attend in anything other than a suit and tie – even if they had said “oh don’t worry we do dress down on a Friday.” When we are attending an interview then we really do need to look at our professional best don’t we?

During a job interview, you spend every moment under examination. There’s no two ways about it. The way you present yourself either leaves your interviewer excited to call you back or eager to put your resume on the bottom of the pile. That being said, keep the following information in mind as you prepare for your next interview… and good luck!

Dress for Success

Many times, your clothing is the thing that gives your interviewer his or her first impression of you. For best results.

Some companies may have a dress code requiring formal business attire, while others choose to keep their dress code more casual. The best way to find out about how a company’s employees dress is to ask. But, if you can’t ask in advance, for me it’s best to dress in a conservative business suit. With a suit and tie I can always remove the tie if it is obvious that I would look out of place! Keep accessories to a minimum, to avoid standing out too much. If your attire draws too much attention, it has the potential to take the focus off of your qualifications and credentials.

Be Confident

Self-confidence is vital when it comes to presenting yourself in a positive way. If you aren’t confident in yourself, how can you expect a potential employer to feel confident in hiring you? The best place to start when it comes to confidence is with a smile. Not only does smiling make you come off as approachable, it also releases endorphins in your body that makes you feel more relaxed.

Additionally, take time to fully prepare yourself before the interview begins. Do a bit of research on the company where you’ll be interviewing. Prepare any documents you may need and practice answers to questions that might come up.

Practice Proper Interview Etiquette

As well as being a stickler for appropriate dress one of the lessons that my Grandfather taught me was to treat everyone with respect from the most junior member of staff to the most senior. Displaying proper professional etiquette can mean the difference between getting hired and being passed over. Offer a firm, confident handshake at the beginning of the interview. Make eye contact during the greeting and when you answer your interview questions.

In addition, make sure to thank the interviewer for their time afterwards. Improper interview etiquette may get overlooked in some cases, but failing to be polite makes you come across as rude and leaves the wrong kind of lasting impression.

While your qualifications go a long way toward landing you a great job, they don’t accomplish the task alone. If you get the position, it’s important to have left your new boss with a good impression right then and there. Projecting a positive image of yourself helps to ensure that their image of you is positive, from the moment you start the new role.